"YOU'RE NOT LISTENING TO ME!!" I'm sure we've heard that statement on quite a few occasions before. How can something seem so simple be so hard? The answer is us! Let's face it, we're all human and we love to relate with others and speak about ourselves. However, sometimes as humans, we also want to be heard. Therefore, when we seek someone out to "vent" or "find" answers, we go to another human for it. Unfortunately, they too love to relate and speak about themselves that it can get frustrating, thus yelling said statement above!
How do we then focus in the art of listening? It's by consciously identifying what level of listening you use when hearing someone out.
Level 1: Internal Listening
This type of listening happens when you are listening to your own inner voice. You may hear what the other is saying but you are also formulating your own opinions, judgments, stories, etc. and itching to share them. Your head is probably saying things such as:
- "I had an experience just like that."
- "This is boring."
- "I'm hungry and I want to eat."
- "I might say something stupid."